Monday, October 23, 2006

A Striking Dichotomy

Two incidents of relatively minimal importance happened at our house this past weekend. Taken separately, each occurrence would be a shrug-off, "one of those things" that makes you just shake your head, roll your eyes, and move on. Together, though, their message becomes multiplicative...and therefore bloggable.

First, I discovered a pro-DeVos bundle of literature dangling from our doorknob. (For those not in the know, Dick DeVos is the former president of Amway and current Republican candidate for Governor here in Michigan.) Anyone who knows us well understands that such a "gift" is positively laughable. While Michigan is definitely and stubbornly embroiled in economic woes, the problem is NOT our current Governor Jennifer Granholm. She is trying desperately to undo 12 years of unholy mismanagement by her predecessor; she is also trying to help the state adjust to a post-auto industry economy where job cuts are a dime a dozen. DeVos is simply another silver spoon-fed rich boy, a political wannabe who is trying to buy political clout with daddy's money. He's another in a long line of slimy Republican scumbags and their supporters, those people who would poison the air, prey upon teenagers, and plunder the earnings of honest & hardworking citizens. All the while claiming to do exactly the opposite, of course. A great example: DeVos claims that "our state has lost over 104,300 jobs." As past president of Amway, he certainly had the wherewithal to keep and/or create jobs in Michigan. However, when I stumbled across a Woodsy Owl ("Give a hoot! Don't pollute!") stuffed toy at a flea market this weekend, I saw two things on the tag: "Amway Corp." and "Made in Taiwan." No, DeVos has already had his chance to keep jobs in Michigan...instead, he sent 'em overseas. He's a bald-faced liar, and I can honestly say I wouldn't lower myself to wiping my oozing, diarrhetic ass with DeVos literature.

The second incident, the one that only serves to highlight an utter absurdity of difference in opinion, was that our "Peace" yard sign was stolen. This is the second time an unhappy fate has befallen such a sign in our yard. The first sign was - get this! - SLASHED WITH A KNIFE! If that doesn't say something ironic about the ultimate success or failure of peace initiatives, I don't know what does. Anyway...our sign this time was just gone. I'd like to think someone was so moved by our declaration of worldly good-heartedness that he simply took it for display in his OWN yard...but I doubt it. (A bold, broad-daylight theft by some scummy DeVos literature-slinger strikes me as more likely.) The thing public, I try to be fairly politically neutral in my opinion-posting. I don't drive around with an "Impeach Bush!" bumper-sticker (although I don't doubt for a moment that, legally, he could be); mine simply reads "Coexist" in letters that are altered to really drive the point home. Likewise, "Peace." Who can argue with EITHER of these points?!? I mean, to NOT coexist with someone means you're always at odds with that person...a crummy way to live. Likewise, if you don't like my peace sign,'re against peace. be AGAINST peace, you're...what? FOR WAR?!? What dumbass WANTS war?!! In my mind, the alternatives to what I'm offering - coexistence and peace - are indefensible. So anyway...hope you enjoyed the sign, you moron. 'Cause we ordered up a 5-pack, and I bet we can outlast you!

*Sigh!* In a totally unrelated move: how about a shout-out to good friends MICHAEL PASSMORE and LISA STANLEY (see blog links at right) for succesfully completing the Chicago Marathon this weekend.



Blogger Timbercake said...

I am appalled your peace sign was stolen. Does that mean they are against peace? Real classy.

I don't know if you heard, but Granholm received the endorsement from the Free Press, Lansing State Journal and Saginaw News this weekend!

Here's a link to Free Press:

The polls are showing Granholm with a 8 or 9 point lead but we still have two long weeks to go before Nov. 7!

2:29 PM  
Blogger L*I*S*A said...

Thanks for the shout-out. It was one of the single most awesome experiences in my lifetime. More on that in the blog.

6:46 AM  
Blogger Mike said...

thanks for the shout out.

Can't wait to run again with you in a race.

The island or perhaps another 5k

Unfortunately the detroit free press has endorsed Granholm while the detroit news endorsed DeVos.

Why unfortunate?

Well, they are mutually owned. The freep always the liberal side and the news always the conservative.

Talk about hedging your bets.

2:47 PM  
Blogger kat said...

Let's set up a webcam on your peace sign. They're, like, what, $5 now?

(I'm appalled at the punctuation I had to use to type how I wanted to say that.)

7:47 PM  
Blogger Steph said...

Sigh. Stupid fuckheads.

You know, I've been coveting for awhile this bumper sticker that says "Unemployed but Safe from GAY MARRIAGE." I'm just worried that the Kansans I'm aiming to skewer won't get the joke, since they really do believe that gay people are forming stealth groups to steal their children in the night and marry them off to canines or something. They'll probably be like, "Right on!"

I swing back and forth between the desire to be relay positive messages a la "Peace" and "Coexist" and the desire to just let these stupid sons of bitches know how pissed off I am, goddammit. Right now I don't have anything on my bumper, because I can't ever decide between these two approaches.

My brilliant spouse, who works for the government, said the other day he wanted to get a T-shirt that said "Chavez/Ahmadinejad 2008." Now THERE'S some constructive activism. Jeez.

9:47 PM  
Blogger Tess said...

I, however, find the message of stealing the sign quite poignant. In this country, we ARE doing everything we possibly can to make PEACE disappear!

5:55 AM  
Blogger Animal said...

Steph, the bumper sticker I saw that I quite liked read:

"Against gay marriage? Blame straight people - they're the ones who keep having GAY BABIES!"

8:17 AM  
Blogger Suze said...

gaaaaaaaa, it all drives me BATSHIT INSANE! (to use my favorite expression from jon stewart.)

i say anyone who actually goes to the effort to steal or deface a peace sign needs an anger management class.

1:50 PM  
Blogger Steph said...

Heehee. That's a good one, Scott.

2:58 PM  
Blogger Mark said...

Guess I can't read your Blog anymore. A little to extreme for me.

5:46 PM  

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